Sunday, March 20, 2011

Orphans and Couples

This morning I went to my friend's church to hear a friend of a few friends (actually we have 22 friends in common according to facebook - from all sorts of different areas of life, so I'm pretty sure we'll be friends soon) share a dream that has been on her heart for years and is now beginning to be put into motion.

The core of her story was how her heart aches for orphans. There are almost as many 'full-orphans' (as in they have lost both parents) as there are people in Australia. And about 163 million 'single-orphans' many for whom the loss of one parent means they no longer have a primary care giver. I was crying along with her as she shared how much each of these kids needs a family to care for them. Kids in poverty and pain break my heart.
She talked about how difficult and costly it is to adopt in Australia. Seriously! It's ridiculous! I know a few people who have adopted and it takes forever and costs more than a family sized car. It makes me so sad that last year only 50 kids were adopted in NSW, a state with over 7 million people can only take care of 50 orphans? Our government's website says that there are not many orphans needing adoption these days & there's a waiting list of 3-7 years because countries are taking care of their own - I TOTALLY believe that countries should take care of their own orphans in their own culture, but when this fails and there are orphanages struggling to cater for the hundreds of kids in their care, and when babies haven't been outside & felt the wind by the time they're 12 months old, when 3 month olds have learnt that crying is pointless, when by one year old kids have learnt to steal food to survive... um I think there is a need for another solution?

This beautiful woman is now working towards changing this, taking back the church's role from the government & taking care of the orphans through starting an international adoption agency (at the moment all international adoptions are done through the government agency). It was so cool to hear her passion and see the steps she is taking towards this incredible goal. I can't wait to see it come to fruition!

Seeing her passion reignited my own dreams. My heart breaks for babies and kids. I absolutely love that I get to work with kids every day! I love that I get to hang out with my boys every now and then (I got to hang with Morgan and Hayden today! woo hoo!). But maybe there's more?  Will I ever be married? I'm not sure. Maybe I'm not meant to be, and that's ok (most days). I would love to be a mum, but there is more than one way to be a 'mum'. I would love to adopt or foster kids in the future. I was thinking about this all day & pondering how much having a child around would change my life.

Something that made me so happy, was that during church I got to hold Morgan for a lot of the time (he is so much fun these days), and then just after I gave him back, Hayden's dad walked across the room and put Hayden in my arms. He and his wife were on Kid's Church & having Hayden as well was too tricky. I love that they trust me with their kid, and out of everyone in their church family I got to hold him. I felt sooooo honoured! I love my boys!

At lunch a few of my beautiful friends were talking about the characteristics they have passed on to their kids. My heart broke for my imaginary adopted child who would never know the weird webbed-toe/double-jointed finger/daddy's nose type characteristics he/she shared with their parents.

At my friend's baby's dedication this afternoon I wondered about dedicating an imaginary adpoted child... It was bitter-sweet imagining. How accepting would my family be of adopted or fostered kids? Would my mum still treat them like her own grandchildren that she craves so much?
 Oh emotions, life would be so boring without you.

After the dedication a friend was talking about the home church she's been going to lately "It's just a group of about 6 couples..." that word stung so much - 'couples'. I didn't see it coming. Singleness hasn't bothered me for months, but tonight I found myself crying over this one word! It wasn't said in spite, she was just stating a fact. Why did it hurt so much? It's such an exclusive group 'couples', but a group most people who are 28 belong to. I don't think I care so much about being single (or maybe I'm in denial), I love being able to do 'whatever I want', to hang out or help out anyone at a moment's notice. I am not lacking love or purpose or dreams. I don't get lonely (usually) or scared (except when there are snakes). I don't need a relationship to fulfil me. I just hate the social stigma of being old and single, I don't belong.

What if I was old and single with a bunch of kids that weren't mine?

Today has been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. It's sort of funny. So many thoughts swimming around in my head. So inspiring & convicting, but at the same time huge and overwhelming. hmm

In other news: Yesterday Louise and I watched 3 movies at the cinema in one day.
Tomorrow school is back to normal (i'm sure the kids won't be though, after so many weeks of rehearsals and performances)
Next weekend I get to hang with Leonard for the whole weekend!

1 comment:

cassandra said...

Emotions! Tears from the moving adoption story & tears cos I love you! Xx (I also love that I giggled in that about your specifics of a 'family-sized car' and that u used 'pondering' in your blog).